Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i think i have two assholes
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Randomize