No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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