Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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