I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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