The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I have feelings that need drinking.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
