I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Randomize
