Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
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