At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
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