Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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