you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
