quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Rumble strips road head = magical
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Randomize
