She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
