How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
