More tranny stories later!
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
