i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Randomize
