No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
