Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
