Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
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