Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Randomize
