Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
