rhymes with "ouble enetration"
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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