Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
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