I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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