Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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