Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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