i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
