id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
