READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
