glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Randomize
