Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
