Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize
