You just made me feel so damn special
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
