why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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