just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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