We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
