I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
