Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
