Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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