What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
