i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
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