4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
