hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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