is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
