Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
