that's an acceptable place to lick
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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