dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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