But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
