Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
he puts the penis in happiness.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize