I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
