i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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